Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Throw It To See If It'll Stick

I can remember when I was younger watching in awe as my Mom would cook spaghetti in the kitchen. When the noodles were done boiling, she'd take one noodle out of the pot and throw it up against the wall. If it stuck, she knew that the noodles were ready. If not, she'd let the noodles continue to boil.

In many ways I feel like my life lately has become it's own little version of "throw it to see if it'll stick". It's like I've got this bowl of opportunities and of things I worked and dreamed so hard for and all I can do is keep throwing this items out of the bowl in any direction that I can think of to see if it'll stick somewhere, anywhere.

One example of this is my education. For many years I worked so hard on completing my university degree by correspondence. It was something that I loved doing and pushed through a lot of obstacles to do. But then there I was, a little over a year away of being done and my health took a nose dive, closing that opportunity to continue. Leaving me with nothing else to do but throw those courses to see if it'll stick somewhere. Will I be granted another extension to wait and see if I'll be well enough to resume school in a few months, years? Will the university count my credits towards a diploma, certificate, anything just so I have something besides debt to show for my work?

Then there's my book. No, not Walking Through A Fallen World, but book number two. I spent all last summer working on this manuscript and after 8 months of throwing it around everywhere to see if it'll stick, I've got nothing. No publishing deal, no agent, no golden opportunity. Just a message that I really believe in and would love to see it spread to the masses.

And while this period of throwing stuff out to see if it'll stick has been frustrating, I've been reminded of something pretty important tonight- just like noodles only stick to the wall when they are ready to eat, God will only let things in our life stick when those things are ready to go forth.

Maybe that means that there's another essential chapter my book is needing that I'll only be inspired to write in a month or two or ten. Or maybe that means that my university experience has fully equipped me for what I'm doing now, which I do love and plan on continuing as far as the eye can see, and to take on more courses would just be a waste of time and money. I don't know. But what I do know is that the One I follow is worth trusting.

So today I'll keep throwing my things against the wall, but instead of shaking my head in frustration as the fall, I'll trust. And when the day does come when one of those things stick, I'll rejoice in knowing that it's happening in the right time, in the right season, for the right reason.

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