Follow the Leader

I've been so tired these past couple of weeks, even more than normal for me, so I was very grateful for the opportunity to get away for a few days. We left Friday night and came back late on Monday.

It was a good time in the middle of God's creation, getting refreshed and having the chance to just take it easy for a change.

While out in the bush I saw the scene to the right play out. A mother duck leading her little ducklings down to the lake. It was so cute and yet a profound lesson at the same time. These little ducklings had only one thing in mind: following their "leader". They weren't looking around at the scenery or watching for obstacles or wondering what I was doing with a camera. Instead, they were just focused on following in their mothers footsteps.

It reminded me of the journey that we are all on in our lives. We're called to "follow the Leader". And as much as we'd like to say that we chase after Him with no hesitation, the truth is often we get distracted by the scenery or start questioning the direction He's leading us in.

I wonder what life would be like if we were as trusting as these ducklings were? They didn't question the orders of the mother. They had no way of knowing that she was leading them to a lake that would provide them with food. They didn't know if the path was safe. They just trusted that she wouldn't be leading them to a place that wasn't good.

Oh that we could have that same level of trust in Someone much greater! A God who moved heaven and earth to show us just how much He loves us and a God who leads us down the path to everlasting life. May we all follow that God with reckless abandon.

Story Of Your Life

Story Of Your Life - Ali Slaight
Do you ever stop and wonder
Where this road will take you
Whats around the corner
Will it make or break you
Is this your destination
Or is it the start of something new?

What will you accomplish
Which way will the wind blow
For every door that closes find an open window
And everyone is watching as you write the story of your life
Of your life

CHORUS
And you won't look back
Cause it feels so right
And no matter what it'll be alright
In the brightest day or the darkest night
You will find yourself in the story of, in the story of your life

Will you do the choosing
Or be the lucky one that's chosen
Will you recognise the greatness in your smallest moments
And every step your taking,
you'll write another chapter
In the story of your life.

This week the "story of my life" took an unexpected twist. I don't mean to be evasive, but this is a piece of news that I'm not quite comfortable sharing the particulars of, yet. But trust me when I say it's definitely one of those "life shifting" things.

So many plans, so many dreams seem to be indefinitely on hold and I'm looking to walk down a pretty long road that I never fully expected.

So this isn't the path that I planned, but at the same time I've become very much aware that it is a part of the story of my life that God wrote before I was even born. This latest turn in the story is no surprise to Him. He's allowed it to come into my life and He's going to give me the strength to walk through it.

In the meantime, I'm learning what it's like to, as the song says, "recognize the greatness in the smallest moments". Life doesn't have to be full of emotional highs and perfect moments to grasp the deepest meaning. Instead I'm learning to find joy in the simple things: a drink of my favorite cup of coffee, talking about faith with friends, late night snood battles, standing outside and breathing deep the clear and crisp air.

Life is never perfect and it's not always easy, but our life stories are ones that are more than worth living.

Online Trip Planning & Saving

I love the internet. Trip planning has never been so easy (or affordable).

For the past couple of months I've been researching hotels on TripAdvisor. Once I picked out my top two in each city, I've been checking their websites randomly, waiting for a price drop or sale.

Tonight I secured the last hotel that we'll be needing for the summer road trip and I was able to get it at a price that was amazing. Gotta love the online specials!

In all three cities that we're staying in we've got hotels that are super-nice for a fraction of the cost we would have paid to reserve over the phone.

In fact, one hotel worker that I spoke to advised me to book online because they can give out cheaper rates on their website than they can over the phone most of the time.

Here's to a great trip at a much lower cost!

This Moment

It's amazing how fast life can change. All it takes is one split moment and suddenly your world can be turned completely around. Have you ever had such a moment? A phone call telling you to rush to the hospital where a loved one lay gravely ill? A few words out of a doctors mouth in an office? A split second decision where you make the wrong choice?

Everything we know. The fabric of our lives. All could be changed in the time it takes the second hand on the clock to move one notch.

We hear of these moments all the time. And while we've become quite good at not letting them fully sink in as they scroll across the evening news, there are times when the tragedy hits too close to home to ignore. And it's in those times when we realize just how fragile our lives truly are.

The truth of the matter is, we are never guaranteed any moment beyond the one that just passed. It doesn't matter how well we live or how much we serve those around us, there are no guarantees. We are only given life moment by moment and sometimes it takes a tragedy to make us realize that.

But when we do let that sink in, something inside of us changes. And it should. For such mortal beings, we have no business wasting our days and counting on an endless amount of tomorrow. As mortals we should never assume anything beyond today.

So what does that realization look like? It means never letting a day go by without telling those around us that we love them. It means never wasting an opportunity that God gives us. It means living each day as it were our last- fully, completely, and with the love of Christ radiating out of our hearts and souls. It means living our lives in such a way that if the next moment doesn't come or comes in a way other than what we expected, there are no regrets or things left undone.

Because the truth is, we just don't know. We don't know how long we have on this earth and we don't know how long our loved ones have with us. We don't know if the opportunity we have today will be given again tomorrow. We don't know anything beyond this moment. Sure we can make plans, sure we can have ideas, but no where are we promised that we'll have the time we need to live them out.

And while to some this is a scary concept, if you truly know and trust the living God of our lives, you know that what He has planned is good. He knows the number of our days and He has blessed us to live in the here and now. So let's learn to appreciate and fully live each moment that we have. Because life is a gift, this moment is a treasure, and there are no room for regrets in a life lived one moment at a time.

Music & Writing

It's been a different couple of days. I'm finally starting to get back on my feet, literally. Tonight I wore socks and shoes for the first time in nearly two weeks- I'm very proud of myself.

Now that I'm more mobile I've got some catching up to do from things that I left undone over the past two weeks, but I'm taking that one day at a time.

One good thing about being flat on my back is it gave me a lot of time to listen to music and I mean really listen, not just have it on in the background. I was given the remastered version of U2's "The Joshua Tree" as a get well gift, so I've been playing that quite a bit.

I've also been doing a lot of writing. I think this week I wrote around 5,000 words which for me is pretty good considering all the other stuff I have going on at the same time. All of the writing was exclusively for the devotional type book that I'm working on. It's really starting to take shape and I'm excited about the prospect of possibly finishing it much sooner than I anticipated. At first I was hoping to have it done by Christmas, but with the way I've been writing I could see myself finishing it by the end of the summer.

With writing this book I'm reminded of the advice A.W. Tozer gave: "The only book that should ever be written is one that flows up from that heart, forced out by the inward pressure. You should never write a book unless you have to."

That was the case for Walking Through A Fallen World and the same could be said for this project too. I can't not write it and that's exciting to me.

Broken Bones, Boredom, and Blessings

I never thought I'd say it, but I'm bored. Completely and utterly bored.

Because of my foot injuries and the "blood bubble" (yeah it looks as lovely as it sounds) that formed over the break, I've been having a pretty monotonous week.

Check work email. Ice foot for fifteen minutes. Elevate foot for 45 minutes. Repeat.

The swelling has gone down a little on the break, but the blood thing is still giving me a lot of pain and making it rough to get around. I had to go to the hospital again on Thursday and that was a challenge.

So until the "blood bubble" disappears and the swelling goes down, I'm basically stuck at home on the same routine. Which has given me the most unproductive week I've had in a long time.

But as bored as I have been, there have been a lot of sunny spots. I've been spoiled rotten by my family. I don't even have to ask for stuff, I'm just getting things left, right, and center. Usually I make coffee, but I've gotten door to door deliveries every single day, without asking. Also things I need just seem to magically follow me around the house- my laptop (awesome for watching TV in bed), my ipod, books, water, pillows, everything. I swear my Mom is "very very sneaky" (yes that's a Mr. Deeds reference- I've watched way too many movies this week!)

Other pluses: I've had a lot of time to be quiet, think, reflect, and pray. I've gotten to read two fiction books from cover to cover, which I haven't done in a long time. And I've gotten a new appreciation for what a gift God has given us with life. It doesn't matter what is going down, it doesn't matter how hard the road gets, every single day we have is a gift from above and deserves to be cherished. So yes, there are blessings even in the midst of broken bones and boredom!

Ugly Break

4 hours spent at the hospital. 3 x-rays. And one diagnoses. I've got one pretty ugly broken toe. And I'm very lucky that's all that's broken.

On Saturday night I came upstairs to find a candle my mom had lit on the stove burning out of control. The flame was huge and wax from the candle was pouring everywhere. In a second of panic, I blew out the candle and grabbed the cast iron dutch oven on the stove to move it out of the way of the flowing wax. Big mistake.

As I was moving the dutch oven, the very heavy lid slipped off and landed directly on my foot.

Instantly my foot exploded in pain. My Mom heard the crash of the lid hitting my foot, then bouncing off on the floor, so she came running and made the wise choice to take me to the hospital.

She called my brother who was out with the car and as soon as he got home they helped me hobble into the vehicle so that I didn't put any weight on my throbbing foot.

I got in pretty much right away, took a wheelchair ride to get some x-rays done and after a couple hours was told that I broke my big toe pretty badly. I was also told how lucky I am that the lid didn't land even an inch higher on my foot. If it had, it would have broken more than one bone in my foot and it would have been a messy recovery.

So for the time being I'm pretty immobile. They can't cast a toe, so I have to be very careful that it remains undisturbed so that it can heal. If I do what I'm told, it should be much better within a week. So my mission now is to keep my foot elevated as much as possible and to put ice on it so that the swelling comes down. Right now my big toe is at least three times the size as normal. The two next to it are pretty swollen as well.

But as bad as it feels and as hard is it is to walk, I'm very thankful because it could have been a heck of a lot worse!

Is it wrong to envy a dog?

It wasn't enough to have a dog bed. A carpet under her food dish. And a towel for sitting in the corner by the window. Now she's converted our heat vents into a sauna.

Do I sound bitter? Maybe a little. But she is cute, isn't she?

Burning Question

If there are two sides to every story, why is it that so often we only want to hear one?

Closing and Starting

Today brought about the close of one year of my life and the start of another. To commemorate, I thought I'd fill you in on a little look back on my 24th year and a look a head to what 25 has in store:

Highlights of 24:

Favorite memory:
-Week spent with my family in Traverse City, Michigan.

Worst memory:
-Well that's one advantage of having a sleeping problem - I don't remember things well. So maybe not remembering is my worst memory. Yes, I'm weird.

Favorite CD listened to:
Toss up between Paul Alan - Drive It Home and Jack's Mannequin - Everything In Transit

Top three books read:
-The Organic God by Margaret Feinberg
-Crowded Skies by Tara Leigh Cobble
-Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne

Surprising Accomplishment:
-Learning how to cook.

Song that best described my year:
-Walk On by U2

Five things to look forward to for year 25:

-Four state summer vacation
-Cottage season!
-Finding answers for my health problem and getting it under control
-Finish writing my second book
-Learning more about how live and minister in the same way Christ did

Macbook :)

Yesterday I picked up a new acquisition: a macbook!

I've been wanting to get a macbook for quite some time now and with my job/ministry commitments, not having a laptop is really awkward at times.

So I've been keeping my eyes open on ebay, the newspaper, etc and on Friday I came across an ad online for someone local who was selling their macbook, so inquired and ended up buying it yesterday.

It's just over a year old and has all the features I've been wanting. And the bonus was the price- very reasonable.

I'm very thankful for this new addition. I can't tell you how many times I've wished that I had a laptop. With work, C&C, and the radio show, it's going to make my life a lot easier. Plus it's a mac, which means I can take my video editing and graphic design to the next level.

What a nice early birthday gift :)

Writing and Such

Yes, I realize it's been over a week since I last posted. My sister's wedding was last weekend and I underestimated what my role was going to be in the pre-wedding preparations. I had no idea our phone could ring that much. I felt like a secretary.

But somehow in the midst of all of the busyness I also found that I feel like a writer again. I've been kicking around four ideas for my next book and I think I've settled on two to start on.

The first is another non-fiction book that'll be a devotional type book. I'm still in the early stages of planning it, but I've got around 3000 words down on paper and I feel inspired to keep writing.

The second project I'm excited about is a novel. I mentioned before that I was thinking about writing one, but this is actually a different story idea that came to me than before (I guess I'll leave that one in the "idea's" folder for now). I don't know if it's ever going to be something that I'll want to try to get published or not, but it's one of those stories I feel that I can't help but write down. I was working on it the other night and within a half hour I had the entire story mapped out from start to finish. So I'm going to keep writing and see where that takes me.

A quote to leave you with:

"Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering." (Ida Scott Taylor)

Not Knowing

Tomorrow I'm set to walk into another doctors office and I have no idea will what the appointment will bring.

Will I finally get the answers I've been seeking for what seems like forever?

Will it lead to more tests, more possiblities?

Will I be stuck waiting for a diagnoses? And in the meantime have no clue what I can do to get rid of these trying symptoms?

I don't know.

But I do know that no matter what happens in that doctors office tomorrow, Someone already knows how it's going to go down. He promises to walk with me through every part of life, both the highs and the lows.

So I do know Who will be with me. And right now, that's all I need to know.

"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love." (Romans 5:3-5)

The Cave

Right now at College and Careers we're working through a video study based on the book "If You Want To Walk On Water, You've Got To Get Out Of The Boat" by John Ortberg.

I read this book for the first time a few years ago and through prepping for the studies, I've been going through chunks of it again. A quote that caught my eye this week:

“Sometimes you are in a cave and no human action is able to get you out. There is something you can’t fix, can’t heal, or can’t escape, and all you can do is trust God. Finding ultimate refuge in God means you become so immersed in His presence, so convinced of His goodness, so devoted to His lordship that you find even the cave is a perfectly safe place to be because He is there with you.” (John Ortberg)

A Life To Give Away

I read this tonight and it really hit home. It comes from the blog of Jon Foreman (Switchfoot). You can follow the link at the bottom of this post to read the whole thing.

"Pieces of us, significant ideals and dreams, now reduced to dust and ash drifting away. Washing away. In every moment there's always the option to run from the momentary pain. momentary little alters to momentary little gods.

But maybe that's just what we've been given: a life to give away. time. meaning. love. we lay these, our gifts on the alters of our choosing. Memories, knowledge, wealth, friends, scars- these are what we accumulate. But these do not come cheap: these possessions will cost us our very lives. We lose ourselves whether we like it or not. This is not a choice. "Listen man, if you lose yourself for my sake you'll find yourself, try and hold on to yourself and you'll lose it."

Yeah, I suppose even Divine love is like that, erosion. washing over us like the rain or the sun or the shore. But to compare the two is absurd. One is life the other is death. But it takes time to tell them apart- I can usually tell which is which a few weeks down the line. The creator's love is creating, additive, purposeful. I feel more complete, more whole, more at home in the "in" and the "of". Make no mistake, he takes things away, and it hurts like hell. It sometimes hurts worse than the other sort of pain, the numb deadening sort. Maybe partly because your more alive, more aware. Or maybe because you're the hands of a friend.

But I suppose thats the difference between the doctor and the dealer: one is the touch of a sculptor one is the glove of a thief."

Read the rest...

The Portable Seminary

Today my day started with one of my favourite things: getting a new shipment of books.

I save up cash and every couple of months order a couple books that I'm interested in. By ordering them all at once I save on shipping and it forces me to be self-controlled and read the ones I already have first.

Anyway, today the book that came in that I'm most excited about is called "The Portable Seminary". It's a huge book- about 700 pages and the purpose of it is to go over a lot of the topics that you would learn if you went to seminary.

Now the people who write the book say themselves it in no way replaces a seminary education, but for people who are interested and can't afford to go or don't have the time to, this gives you a starting point for many of the topics you'd see covered there.

So I'm excited to dive into it. Some sections that look pretty appealing:

-Old and New Testament surveys
-ethics
-systematic theology
-apologetics

For myself I'm hoping this serves as kind of a diving board to get me started on studying topics that I've been interested in for years, but have never really taken the time to look into fully for myself.

Paul Alan

For years I've been a Paul Alan fan. I've made it no secret that in my opinion his CD "Falling Awake" is one of the best Christian albums that has ever been recorded.

So you can imagine how excited I was to find out that he has released a new CD! It's called "Drive It Home" and after ordering it, I got access to download the album and after listening to it a couple times, I think it is fair to say it's another classic!

Right now my favourite song on it is "To Bring You Back". Check it out on his myspace page and be amazed!

Paul Alan - To Bring You Back

are you thirsty
standing in the rain
not sure where you are
or how you lost your way
hey, hey, hey
are you drowning
in some bar outside of town
searching for something given…
not found
a crowd of people and totally alone
at the front door
but worlds away from home

light up the night’s last regret
burn your only safety net
step to the edge
it’s such a long way down

I left the ninety nine to find the one
and you’re the one
I’ve walked 1000 miles in this desert sun
only to bring you back…

are you tired of chasing the wind
underwater…
do you aspire to breathe again
are you dying
is that the best that you can do
’cause you can’t find your place in a world that wasn’t meant for you

I left the ninety nine to find the one
and you’re the one
I’ve walked 1000 miles in this desert sun
only to bring you back…

hello it’s me
I couldn’t sleep
I was just counting sheep and I’m missing you…

Weekend Seminar

So this weekend I attended the Growing A Healthy Church seminar at my church and wow, was it ever good!

Often I find we tend to overcomplicate things and with church and ministry it's no different. But this course wasn't something to add to the confusion, but rather to clarify it all. To remove all of the extra's that man has added over time and to focus on how Jesus lived His life.

So using Jesus' ministry as the framework we learned how to effectively live out a life that multiplies and blesses the lives of those we come into contact with. And this applies both on a personal level and a ministry one.

I took a lot of notes and we were each given a workbook, which I'm going to be going over many times in the coming weeks and months. I see there are a lot of areas where I can improve how I minister to others and how I grow myself. Not so much by following steps a, b, and c, but rather by having a different mindset in the way I do things.

I'm sure as I process the lessons learned I'll be posting more on it in the near future, but for now I'll leave you with a couple quotes from the seminar that are still swirling about in my mind:

"Because we're busy we settle for what's easy, but not for what's best."

"Your attitude towards people reflects your attitude towards God."

"Sunday morning is a reflection of what is taking place in people's lives throughout the week."

"You can teach skills and you can teach knowledge, but you can't install a heart for God and service in someone else."

"Because of his humanity, Jesus faced limitations like we do. Even though he passionately loved all people, he could not be everywhere at once. He knew that to reach the masses he had to invest in a few- so that the masses could be ultimately reached."

Growing A Healthy Church

This weekend I'm pumped to be attending a "Growing A Healthy Church" seminar that's being held at our church.

I've heard nothing but good things about this course and even though I'm no pastor or church planter, I'm hoping to learn lots that can help me with leading College and Careers and hopefully in other ministry areas as well.

Speaking of ministry, I got some pretty amazing news yesterday. Supposedly some Wal-Mart stores in the US are now carrying my book! I don't know how many stores have it in stock or if it's selling, but that doesn't really matter. I'm just thrilled to know that such a big chain of stores somehow got a hold of something I wrote. And through the grace of God, maybe just one life can be changed.

Stranger things have happened.

Saying "no"

Today I said no to something that I was asked to do and I can't tell you how good it feels. By nature I'm somewhat of a people pleaser (which I think deep down most of us are). So when I get asked to do things, I have a really hard time saying 'no'.

Over the years, I've gotten better at this, but I still find it difficult sometimes when I'm asked. Mostly because most of the requests I get are for good things. Great things even. But sometimes a good thing can turn into a bad thing if you're not the right person for the job or you're over-committed as it is.

So I said no. I explained that I've got a job that I love that is my focus. Ministries that are my passion. And family and friends who I'd like to spend more time with, not less.

It felt good to have the freedom to say no. I wish I could have learned this very important lesson years ago- it would have made life a whole lot less complicated.