You Hold Me Now

I heard the song "You Hold Me Now" by Hillsong United for the first time yesterday and it really spoke to me. Sometimes it's easy to get so caught up in the pain and darkness in front of us that we forget the hope that we have in Christ.

"No weeping, no hurt or pain
No suffering, You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness, no sick or lame
No hiding, You hold me now
You hold me now

In this life I will stand
Through my joy and my pain
Knowing there's a greater day
There's a hope that never fails."

From 26 to 27

So tomorrow I make the transition from age 26 to 27. To celebrate, I'll be hiding out in the bush with some of my favourite people in the world. When I think of the fact that I'm already going to be 27, it floors me. Yet all it takes is a quick look in the mirror to see the grey hairs that are accumulating to confirm that yes, I am getting older.

But getting older is not necessarily a bad thing. Because with age comes wisdom and maturity. And I'm much more comfortable with the person I've become at 27 than the person that I was at 17.

So to commemorate another year in my life that's come and gone, I've decided to take a quick look back on my favourite things of year 26.

Favourites of 26:
Book: Jesus Wants To Save Christians by Rob Bell. I cannot say enough good things about this book. I'm not being over dramatic when I say I think it's one that every Christian should read and then re-read. There are so many valuable lessons that can be learned and I love the way that Rob captures the whole story of our redemption from Old Testament to New Testament.

Movie: The Blind Side. My favourite kinds of movies and books are those based on a true story. Something about that just adds an element of validity to it in my mind. I'm also a fan of sports movies and Sandra Bullock, so all things combined, how could I not love this movie? The storyline was great and the acting believable, I highly recommend it.

Album: Alter The Ending by Dashboard Confessional. My brother introduced me to Dashboard Confessional a couple years ago and I've been a fan ever since, so I was very excited to find out that he was coming out with a new CD this year and had to pick it up. It did not disappoint. Until Morning is a catchy song that has also become my ringtone and the album is filled with other outstanding tracks like Get Me Right, Belle of the Boulevard, and Hell on the Throat. I love the spiritual undertones that sprinkle this whole album- it's fantastic.

TV Show: The Good Wife. I love reading books and watching movies and tv shows about lawyers, but ever since The Practice left the airways (and I'm talking about the original Practice), I had yet to find another lawyer based tv show that I really loved. That is, until The Good Wife hit the air. While the story revolves around lawyers and their practice, it also adds an interesting element regarding political scandals and marriage. Plus it's set in my favourite city- Chicago, so all things considered, it became pretty much an instant favourite.

Experience: Year 26 was a hard year in a lot of ways, but in others it was definitely one of my best. It was packed full of new experiences, like venturing into songwriting, seeing a musical, and taking my first trip to an art museum. Fun moments, like my brothers wedding, a trip down south last summer, and many amazing weekends at the cottage. Growing moments, like working on my next book (more on that to come!). And many learning experiences. To pick one experience that rises above the rest is an impossible thing to do, which in itself is a good thing because I've been blessed with so many of them!

So the chapter on year 26 has come to a close, but I am looking forward to year 27 and the possibilities that it brings.

Wisdom from Merton

"My Lord God,
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following
your will does not mean
that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that my desire to please you
does in fact please you.
And I hope that I have that desire
in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything
apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this
you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust you always
though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear,
for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me
to face my perils alone."
- Thomas Merton (1915-1968)

The new pain & energy meter

Have you ever gone to a doctor's appointment and they ask you to rate your pain or energy on a scale of 1-10? I've been asked that question many times and it always throws me. It just seems to be too vague. For pain, do they mean a 10 is the worst pain I've ever experienced? Or the worst pain I could ever imagine experiencing? And when it comes to energy, that's also vague because my energy levels can change from one hour to the next.

A friend and I were discussing this the other night and it turns out I'm not the only one who has trouble answering these questions. So we came up with the idea about doctors using a concrete scale that people can relate with. We came up with a few ideas of ways to measure pain, then the other night when I had a little too much time on my hands, I finished it.

So for anyone who's ever had trouble determining if your ache is a 2 or 7, this is for you:

Pain meter
0 - Happy as a clam
1 - Someone poked you (not on facebook, real life buddy)
2 - Paper cut
3 - Stubbed toe
4 - Fell playing hockey in the snow
5 - Body slammed into the wall
6 - Punched in the face
7 - Finger stuck in a car door
8 - Fastball to the face
9 - A car ran over your foot
10 - Your arm just fell off and someone just dropped a cast iron pot on your toe.

And then of course, there's the lack of energy meter,

0 - Red Bull was named after you.
1 - Your sleep is solid and you feel like a million bucks. If only you could transfer feelings into dollars...
2 - The world seems like a much better place when you're sitting on the sofa with a remote in hand
3 - You just downed an energy drink and still have trouble remembering your first name
4 - You're winded from that long journey to tie your shoelaces
5 - Energy? Like money that's a foreign concept
6 - Yawn isn't just a four letter word, it's the only one you manage to keep saying over and over again
7 - Your speech is slurred, and it's not just from all the alcohol last night
8 - Brain is on neutral, eyes need to be supported open by toothpicks
9 - Brain is off, but you still know it's there. Or you suspect it is.
10 - The amount of energy your body has when you sleep. Or at least you think it does.

Just bring this with you to your next doctors appointment so they can know exactly what you're thinking and feeling! lol

Trip Down Memory Lane

Kodak Gallery is having a sale on photo prints, so I decided to tackle a project I've been putting off for years- getting my digital prints developed. I bought my first digital camera back in 2003 and since then most of my photos have been saved on a hard drive, not printed for an album or displayed.

As I've been going through thousands of photos this week, it's been like taking a major trip down memory lane. Photos from trips, birthdays, graduations, retreats, weddings, and events I had all but completely forgotten about passed before my eyes this week.

Two things really stood out to me as I've been going through visual representations of the last 7 years of my life. The first is how quickly life can change. When I look back I can see how everything is different now even compared to a few years ago. Life is always changing!

The second thing that struck me was the value of community. As I looked at snapshots from my life from over the years I saw many important faces. People who I've laughed with, grown with, leaned on, and had the time of my life with. And while many of the experiences I've had in my life have been great in and of themselves, it was often the people I was with who really made the memory. I was reminded of something that C.S. Lewis once wrote:

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival." (CS Lewis)

Really is there anything better than journeying through life with other people by your side? I have a feeling the community we experience here is a small taste of the joy and love we're going to experience in the afterlife. God knew what He was doing when He designed community. No, it's not perfect and yes, there are times when people will let us down. But if we don't take that risk, we're never going to experience the blessing that can be found in the people we journey through life with.

"Life is partly what we make it, and partly what is is made by the friends we choose." (Tennessee Williams)

Darkness & Light

On Sunday I returned home after spending a couple of days in Toronto. I had a doctors appointment and we decided to spend an extra two days exploring the city afterwards.

One of the these days we went to the Art Gallery of Ontario to view the King Tut exhibit. While the exhibit was fabulous, the gallery itself was also pretty incredible. I love photography and was thrilled to explore the large exhibit they had, mostly of black and white prints. They also had a whole room dedicated to the masters of the details- Freud and Rembrandt. I was surprised to see just how many sketches Rembrandt did of Biblical scenes. I think he captured the story of Abraham and Isaac more profoundly in one picture than I've ever seen or heard it explained before.

On the way out I stopped by the store and while browsing, I came across a painting by Lawren Harris that I really connected with. At first glance I know it's not the most amazing painting that's ever been done, but there's something about his use of darkness and light that really resounded with me:

To me this painting speaks to the truth that many times in life there is a lot of darkness in front of us and it's easy to just focus on the darkness, the ugliness, the despair. But if we take our eyes off of the foreground and look at the whole picture we can get a glimpse of the light, and the hope, in the distance. Light and hope which we are moving towards, not away from. At the same time, the light can cast on even the darkest things, as we see with the outline of the trees in this painting.

So needless to say I ended up buying a print of this painting and will be hanging it on my office wall. A reminder that even in the darkness, there is light and hope in the distance.

The Words I Would Say

Over the past couple of days I've been thinking a lot about comings and goings. Maybe that has something to do with getting ready to take a trip, but I've been thinking about our "hello's" and "goodbye's" in life. In my case now I might be only leaving for a few days, but what would I change if I knew I was leaving and never coming back?

Would I change the way I talk with my friends, my family? Would I spend more quality time with them? Would I see that person who lives ten minutes away, but might as well live 10,000 miles away for all we see each other? What would I do differently?

And as I thought about this more, I realized how important it is in life to never leave things undone. Because while I've booked a return ticket to come home after my trip, we never really know what life has in store for us or the people we love. Nothing is a guarantee and that said, we shouldn't get too comfortable with the idea of a certain tomorrow. Not that we should freak out and never plan for tomorrow, but we should never leave things undone or unsaid because the truth is we really don't know.

Olympics

I've always been a fan of the Olympics, but I can say with certainty that I've never before gone as "Olympic crazy" as I did this time around. I think having the torch pass through our community on the way to Vancouver helped in reminding me what our great country is all about and what it really means to be patriotic. Then watching our athletes rise to the top on home soil? That just sweetened the deal.

But the Olympics are about more than just winning gold medals. They are about countries coming together who normally would not stand next to each other. They are about lowering the walls the divide us. And they are about victorious moments when athletes surpass what seem to be insurmountable obstacles in order to stand on the podium, representing their country.

Yes, Canada won more gold medals than any other country has ever won at a winter Olympics game, but that's not why I'm proud to be Canadian. I'm proud of our never give up spirit and I'm proud that even in a country that is as spread out and as diverse as we are- we still can come together and stand as one. And isn't that what the Olympics are all about after all?

My Weekend In Review

This weekend started off in a rather weird way on Friday night when I heard the doorbell ring after dinner. I opened the door only to find a guy with a ski mask and goggles and a sign that said "come with me". It turned out my "fake kidnapper" was commissioned by a group of friends who wanted me to come out to watch a movie and chose a rather interesting way to pass on the invitation! For someone who rarely gets surprised, I have to say they did a pretty good job getting me.

Saturday was a beautiful day weather wise so in the afternoon we grabbed our skates and headed out to the skating rink. The conditions were great and it was good to be back on skates again. We always had rinks in our yard growing up, so I pretty much grew up skating and sadly don't skate nearly often enough now that I'm older.

Sunday morning brought about a great service at my home church. Our pastor spoke on pursing excellence in our lives and I was challenged to be more mindful of where I'm investing my best. Is it towards my relationship with God? Sadly not always, but that's something I'm going to work on.

After church I went over to my grandfathers house to meet up with the rest of the family, which was followed by dinner at my brothers place. After dinner I went to a friends place to watch the Canadian men's team take on the USA in the Olympics. While Canada ultimately came out with a disappointing loss, it was a good effort and I enjoyed the game. Here's to hoping the team makes out better when they face off against Germany on Tuesday!

The Best Question Ever & Fearless

Life's been good and I've been learning a lot lately.

At College and Career's we've been going through a series called "The Best Question Ever" by Andy Stanley and it's been quite eye-opening. Andy's best question is not "What is the right thing to do?" or "What is the moral thing to do", but "Based on my past history, my current situation and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing to do?". It's one of the most applicable series I've ever gone through and I highly recommend it for small group or personal study.

At the same time I'm also going through the book "Fearless" by Max Lucado with my best friend. We've been reading through it a chapter at a time, then taking time to discuss what we've read and go through the questions in the discussion guide that's at the back of the book. I believe we're only at chapter 4 and already the content has been worth the price of the book. Some of my favourite quotes so far:

"Fear never wrote a symphony or poem, negotiated a peace treaty, or cured a disease. Fear never pulled a family out of poverty or a country out of bigotry. Fear never saved a marriage or a business. Courage did that. Faith did that. People who refused to consult or cower to their timidities did that. But fear itself? Fear herds us into a prison and slams the door. Wouldn't it be great to walk out?"

"Feed your fears and your faith will starve. Feed your faith and your fears will."

"Fear at it's center is perceived loss of control."

So what good books, DVD's or studies have you been into lately?

Some thought provoking quotes

Here are some quotes that have been circling in my mind over this past week:

"Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't." (Richard Bach)

"Unbeing dead isn't being alive." (E.E. Cummings)

"To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else." (Emily Dickinson)

"Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare." (Japanese Proverb)

Shocking Story

There's a shocking story in the news today about parents who are fighting doctors who want to remove their baby from life support. According to the story, these parents were handed a letter saying when the doctors planned on taking their baby off life support and were surprised as they had not made the decision themselves to do so. Now they are caught up in a court battle in order to fight to give their baby more time.

Isn't that scary that decisions like that have been removed from our hands? It used to be that a family would make a choice depending on their own beliefs and what their loved ones wishes would have been. Now a medical team can make a choice and even if you disagree with it, they'll proceed unless the courts intervene on your behalf (the Terri Schiavo case was a very sad example of this).

That's one of the reasons I believe it's so important to have a Power of Attorney for Personal Care. Not only does this give you the chance to legally appoint who you would like speaking on your behalf in a situation where you could not, but it gives you the opportunity to clearly communicate your wishes and it's all recorded on a legal document (to download the form for Canadians click here).

I know it's not pleasant to have to think about what might happen if, but in a society where there are more grey areas than black or white, I feel it's important that we make our opinions known if we feel strongly one way or the other.

Josh Wilson

You're stuck in an airport during a security breach. It's packed and people are getting very impatient. So what do you do to help the situation? Well if you're Josh Wilson you start leading an impromptu sing-a-long.

Check out the amazing video below and if you haven't heard Josh Wilson's music, I highly recommend checking out his album "Trying To Fit The Ocean In A Cup".

Christmas Re-cap

Well Christmas Day has come and gone and what a wonderful Christmas it was.

Christmas Eve I received one of the best Christmas gifts I've ever gotten (more on that to come) and enjoyed Christmas Eve service at my home church. Afterwards we headed over to my grandfather's house where we visited and watched the Griswold's Christmas Vacation- a favourite in our family.

Christmas Day was packed full of visits with various members of our family, both immediate and extended. Our family started a new tradition this year- a Christmas baking contest. We each anonymously brought in a dessert to my grandfather's house at dinner and nominated two judges to decide which ones were worthy of being called winners. My sister-in-law took first place, followed by my cousin in second and myself in third. I made no-bake chocolate cookie squares and not only are they easy to make, but they are tasty.

I've been very much enjoying the large amount of free time that the Christmas holidays bring. On the weekend I spent one day mostly reading, which is something I love to do, but have rarely spent that much time doing lately. Yesterday a friend and I re-visited our childhoods and went sliding. Other than one really wicked wipe-out, I survived with only a few bruises. Tonight's activities of choice was dinner and bowling, followed by a free skate (thank you Tim Horton's!) at a local arena.

And maybe that's one of the things I love the most about Christmastime- the lack of schedules that were are so ingrained into keeping. Instead we're free to enjoy spontaneous time shared with family and friends.

Christmas

This year our family is doing something a little different- we're celebrating two Christmas'. Since my sister and her husband aren't able to come for the actual Christmas day because of work, they are driving up today and tonight we are having what we've come to refer to as our "fake Christmas". Big meal, gift exchange, Christmas baking, the works. Then next Friday I get to do it all over again with our extended family.

I just love this time of year. There's something about Christmas that is so special. Maybe it's the fact that we actually pause to spend more time with the people who are important to us. Maybe it's the feeling of expectation in the air. Maybe it's seeing people you haven't seen in forever and having the opportunity to get caught up. Maybe it's the hope that Christmas represents. Or maybe it's all of the above. I can't put my finger on it exactly, but there's no denying that there is something so different and wonderful about this time of year.

And speaking of Christmas, if you are in for some good Christmas music, over the next week or so the stations who air MAD will be airing our MAD Christmas Special. It's a couple of hours of Christmas music, memories from the artists and reflections on the season. And what makes it even more special this year is the fact that I'm joined by a special guest co-host! You'll have to tune in to find out who it is, but I can tell you this much- we had a blast putting it together. To see where and when you can listen, visit http://www.madradioshow.net/tune.html.

Gifts in the Manger

To prepare my own heart for Christmas and to put together a series for College and Careers, I've been spending quite a bit of time contemplating Christmas. One thing that has struck me this year is the vast amount of gifts we received (and still are receiving) in Christ.

You see I've known and believed that Jesus came to die for my sins. And while that is true, there are also quite a few other reasons why He came. Here are some verses I've come across in my studies:

"For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will. And this is the will of God, that I should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them up at the last day." (John 6:38-39)

"I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the dark. " (John 12:46)

"Don’t misunderstand why I have come. I did not come to abolish the law of Moses or the writings of the prophets. No, I came to accomplish their purpose." (Matthew 5:17)

"Jesus responded, 'You say I am a king. Actually, I was born and came into the world to testify to the truth. All who love the truth recognize that what I say is true.'" (John 18:37)

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)

"But when people keep on sinning, it shows that they belong to the devil, who has been sinning since the beginning. But the Son of God came to destroy the works of the devil. " (1 John 3:8)

I had read most of these verses many times before, but I never really realized how often Jesus said the words "I came" and proceeded to tell us reasons why He came into our earth on that very first Christmas morning.

As if the forgiveness of sins and redemption of mankind wasn't enough! He also came into the world to: give us abundant life, bring us light in the darkness, provide Truth that casts out lies, fulfil the law, the list goes on and on and on.

It's one thing to imagine how horrible it would be if there was no hope of the afterlife following the here and now. But this Christmas I'm also mindful of the fact that our lives here and now could be much different without the gifts that Christ gives us. I don't know about you, but without peace or hope or the light of Christ, my life would be very different than it is. And the only reason I have these things is because God made the choose to send His Son into our world. What a truly amazing gift that is!

iPod Touch

Last month I made the leap and finally bought an ipod touch. It's something I've wanted for a while, but I'm very cautious when it comes to decision making, so it took me a while to finally make the purchase. Am I ever glad I did.

This thing is incredible. I can watch movies or tv shows on it. I can check my email or surf the internet as long as there's wifi available. I can get details on the weather or play games. I can read the Bible or other books. It even has two built-in apps that let you take voice memos or notes, which comes in very handy.

The best thing about the ipod touch is that you can get most of the apps that are available for the iphone, so the sky is pretty much the limit of what you can add on and do on this thing.

Yesterday I was stuck waiting for tests for a couple of hours and thanks to having my ipod touch with me, I didn't even mind the wait.

Wisdom from Merton

"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them." (Thomas Merton)

The Civil Wars

When I first started to get into Christian music, one of my favourite artists early on was Joy Williams. I found her music to be a great combination of songs that pick you up and songs that move you.

So I was pretty disappointed when for a few years she kind of dropped off the radar. Well, now she's back and in my opinion, is better than ever. She's putting out both stuff on her own, and as part of the duo otherwise known as The Civil Wars.

Tonight I heard their new song "Poison & Wine" for the first time and it's fantastic. It's one that will hit home for anyone who's been through a divorce or break-up.

Here's the video for you to enjoy:

Toronto Trip

Well I've been back from Toronto for a couple of days now. It truly was a great trip. My doctors appointment went very well and it was nice to have a bit of time to explore the city. Although I've been to Toronto quite a few times over the years, this was my first time actually staying right downtown. Hearing siren after siren (we were in the hospital district) took some getting used to, but it was worth it to be in the middle of the action and in walking distance from pretty much everything we wanted to do during our free time.

One of the highlights for me was seeing the Dead Sea Scrolls at the Royal Ontario Museum. There was something about seeing parts of the Bible in the original language that was thrilling, but then also to know that these scrolls were thousands of years old? It was an experience like no other that's for sure.

Another amazing thing they had at the museum was an actual chunk of stone from the temple in Jerusalem. The stone had stayed in tact even with the destruction of the temple and historians believe that the very stone was something that was overtop a door of the temple. Meaning that Jesus would have walked right under this stone during His time on earth!

For that to still be in tact over two thousand years later is amazing. But that they were able to transport it to Canada where I was able to stand next to it in a museum was just incredible. I have to imagine the feeling I had looking at the stone and the scrolls is a small comparison of what it would feel like to walk in the footsteps of Jesus in the actual Holy Land.

Unfortunately to preserve the artifacts, no cameras were allowed in that part of the museum, so I don't have any pictures. But I do highly recommend checking out the exhibit if you have the chance!